Thursday, June 28, 2007
Diversity
Today on New Montgomery a girl stopped me and asked me to go to church. I find this funny because yesterday a guy stopped me and asked me if I wanted some crystal meth. Welcome to San Francisco.
Friday, June 15, 2007
Being Gay is the Bomb!
United States Air force government papers have been found stating that our military investigated building a 'gay bomb', making enemy soldiers 'sexually irresistible' to each other.
SERIOUSLY??
I first read this article of some obscure newspaper, and found that I went through the five stages of grief almost immediately.
1. Denial: Really? I mean, I’m not a huge fan of our government right now, but they wouldn't really....Maybe this is an Onion headline. It has to be. Oh those guys did it again. Hilarious....or maybe it real....I should look for some other sources. Lets see, Google search. "U.S military Gay Bomf" And enter. Yes, Google, I did mean "U.S Military Gay Bomb". Ok, lets see what we got... BBC NEWS!?!?!
2. Anger: !?!?!?!!!?!??!?!?!?!?!????!?!???? OK, this has to be real. BBC News is one of the most unbiased news sources in the world. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH OUR COUNTRY. At this point, I continue reading, next to this brilliant idea, they also thought of "sting me/attack" chemical weapon to attract swarms of angry wasps and rats, and (get ready for this one) a "who me" bomb which would simulate flatulence’s in the enemy ranks. First of all, who needs a bomb for that, just send an undercover cook on the enemy base to fix Mexican for dinner, and two, being gay and farting are comparable things to the United States government.
3. Bargaining: After more pondering, I thought this fart thing could actually be kind of funny. Picture Osama Bin Laden smelling his own farts....king of halarious. Ok U.S government, you can make the gay bomb as long as you make that fart bomb, capture Osamo, get some prick to "sneak in" a camera phone, and illegally record it and put it on YouTube.
4. Depression: No, no, no, that’s wrong. And just plain sad. How in the hell could an entire group of people honestly believe that homosexuals, when given the choice to take a bullet or stick their tongue down someone’s throat they would choose the latter. Because sexual attraction, I’m sorry, homosexual attraction (sexual attraction would imply this country viewed hetero and homosexuals as equals) is so completely paralyzing that you cannot fulfill your duties. These are the people controlling the war in Iraq, no wonder we are still there, doing absolutely nothing. And not only that, it was a six year plan that would have cost 7.5 million dollars. Bye bye tax dollars! Apparently here in America, our hard earned tax money goes towards breeding hate. Wonderful.
and 5. Acceptance: "Gay community leaders in California said Friday that they found the notion of a "gay bomb" both offensive and almost laughable at the same time." If they can laugh about it, I suppose I can. At this point, our country should probably take anyone who’s willing to take a bullet for this backwards shit hole, but that’s a whole other rant!
Ahhhhh the joys of freedom of speech. Thank you America, for being so negligent and prejudice, so I can exercise my right to bitch about it, while all the “don’t ask don’t tell" heterosexual soliders fight to maintain that right.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/4174519.stm
SERIOUSLY??
I first read this article of some obscure newspaper, and found that I went through the five stages of grief almost immediately.
1. Denial: Really? I mean, I’m not a huge fan of our government right now, but they wouldn't really....Maybe this is an Onion headline. It has to be. Oh those guys did it again. Hilarious....or maybe it real....I should look for some other sources. Lets see, Google search. "U.S military Gay Bomf" And enter. Yes, Google, I did mean "U.S Military Gay Bomb". Ok, lets see what we got... BBC NEWS!?!?!
2. Anger: !?!?!?!!!?!??!?!?!?!?!????!?!???? OK, this has to be real. BBC News is one of the most unbiased news sources in the world. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH OUR COUNTRY. At this point, I continue reading, next to this brilliant idea, they also thought of "sting me/attack" chemical weapon to attract swarms of angry wasps and rats, and (get ready for this one) a "who me" bomb which would simulate flatulence’s in the enemy ranks. First of all, who needs a bomb for that, just send an undercover cook on the enemy base to fix Mexican for dinner, and two, being gay and farting are comparable things to the United States government.
3. Bargaining: After more pondering, I thought this fart thing could actually be kind of funny. Picture Osama Bin Laden smelling his own farts....king of halarious. Ok U.S government, you can make the gay bomb as long as you make that fart bomb, capture Osamo, get some prick to "sneak in" a camera phone, and illegally record it and put it on YouTube.
4. Depression: No, no, no, that’s wrong. And just plain sad. How in the hell could an entire group of people honestly believe that homosexuals, when given the choice to take a bullet or stick their tongue down someone’s throat they would choose the latter. Because sexual attraction, I’m sorry, homosexual attraction (sexual attraction would imply this country viewed hetero and homosexuals as equals) is so completely paralyzing that you cannot fulfill your duties. These are the people controlling the war in Iraq, no wonder we are still there, doing absolutely nothing. And not only that, it was a six year plan that would have cost 7.5 million dollars. Bye bye tax dollars! Apparently here in America, our hard earned tax money goes towards breeding hate. Wonderful.
and 5. Acceptance: "Gay community leaders in California said Friday that they found the notion of a "gay bomb" both offensive and almost laughable at the same time." If they can laugh about it, I suppose I can. At this point, our country should probably take anyone who’s willing to take a bullet for this backwards shit hole, but that’s a whole other rant!
Ahhhhh the joys of freedom of speech. Thank you America, for being so negligent and prejudice, so I can exercise my right to bitch about it, while all the “don’t ask don’t tell" heterosexual soliders fight to maintain that right.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/4174519.stm
Monday, June 11, 2007
Reincarnation of Hippies?
I am jobless. I quit my job I hated and am now on the hunt...again. I have spent my days reading the A.V Club articles and looking at Paris Hiltons mug shot. What is wrong with me. This isn't me. I hate Paris Hilton, and mug shots for that matter. Although with the time off, I had had the opportunity for some more fun. Yesterday was jam packed: breakfast with Chris and Katy at a Belgium Crepe place in Hayes Valley, off to Golden Gate Park for the Vivienne Westwood exhibit, which by the way was inspiring. She was and is a one woman show, self taught, and started an entire generational movement almost single handily, with a little help from the Sex Pistols. Amazing. We checked some of the rest of the de Young, but didn’t have time to see everything. It was a really great collection of art, very eclectic and design focused. I loved it.
We then went to a live 'performance art' piece, which turned out to be more of a 'living art' piece in Golden Gate park on the top of strawberry hill. Only in San Francisco can I hike up a hill only to find vegetables mourning Buddha’s death. On to the next thing, the Haight Street Parade! Enough said there, use your imagination, just close your eyes and picture what a Haight Street Parade would look like. Got it? Yes, lots of hippies, music, pot, and homeless people. It was great. The parade was basically four different stereotypes of people copied over and over again.
1- Burnout hippy guy in a tie dye shirt and a long beard, begging for money. "I could be robbing people" declares their torn side of a brown box sign, next to his Starbucks cup full of pennies. Thanks smelly homeless guy! You’re not violently robbing me, only subtly robbing me! And while I'm on the topic, De raised an interesting question yesterday, how can all of these homeless people afford Starbucks?
2- Not homeless hippies. These are the hippies who put money into their lifestyle (i know, irony). These are kinds of people who exchange hugs for good vibes. They noodle dance while the band plays, and generally don’t do any harm, so I say "right on!".
3- Artsy music snobs who stepped out of their studio apartment to see what all the fuss is about. Their eyes pass judgment on the live music and art tents underneath their black-rimmed glasses and shaggy chic hairstyles. "Who’s this band playing?" you ask and they respond "oh I don’t remember the name, its kind of like bloc party meets velvet underground, post john cale that is. Kind of like a lo-fi Decemberists with a little sadcore thrown in." Wait....what? Excuse me?
4- and last but not least, the really really drunk person. Now at any other parade this would seems pretty staple, but this is Haight street. So now the guy acting like a frat pledge initiating in the middle of the Kentucky Derby’s infield screaming "Show me your boobs!" is not the life of the party, he is now the stoners buzz kill. "duuude, what the hell man, chill. woah, he’s like, a total buzz kill, ya know?" says the hippie in the token lethargic voice.
So thats how I ended my day, interacting with those four people. Over and over and over again.
We then went to a live 'performance art' piece, which turned out to be more of a 'living art' piece in Golden Gate park on the top of strawberry hill. Only in San Francisco can I hike up a hill only to find vegetables mourning Buddha’s death. On to the next thing, the Haight Street Parade! Enough said there, use your imagination, just close your eyes and picture what a Haight Street Parade would look like. Got it? Yes, lots of hippies, music, pot, and homeless people. It was great. The parade was basically four different stereotypes of people copied over and over again.
1- Burnout hippy guy in a tie dye shirt and a long beard, begging for money. "I could be robbing people" declares their torn side of a brown box sign, next to his Starbucks cup full of pennies. Thanks smelly homeless guy! You’re not violently robbing me, only subtly robbing me! And while I'm on the topic, De raised an interesting question yesterday, how can all of these homeless people afford Starbucks?
2- Not homeless hippies. These are the hippies who put money into their lifestyle (i know, irony). These are kinds of people who exchange hugs for good vibes. They noodle dance while the band plays, and generally don’t do any harm, so I say "right on!".
3- Artsy music snobs who stepped out of their studio apartment to see what all the fuss is about. Their eyes pass judgment on the live music and art tents underneath their black-rimmed glasses and shaggy chic hairstyles. "Who’s this band playing?" you ask and they respond "oh I don’t remember the name, its kind of like bloc party meets velvet underground, post john cale that is. Kind of like a lo-fi Decemberists with a little sadcore thrown in." Wait....what? Excuse me?
4- and last but not least, the really really drunk person. Now at any other parade this would seems pretty staple, but this is Haight street. So now the guy acting like a frat pledge initiating in the middle of the Kentucky Derby’s infield screaming "Show me your boobs!" is not the life of the party, he is now the stoners buzz kill. "duuude, what the hell man, chill. woah, he’s like, a total buzz kill, ya know?" says the hippie in the token lethargic voice.
So thats how I ended my day, interacting with those four people. Over and over and over again.
Thursday, June 7, 2007
Things I would rather do today than work
1. do all of my laundry
2. watch a fraiser marathon
3. walk the taylor/california hill 10 times back to back
4. walk through the tenderloin with $1000 cash in my back pocket
5. shit every time i blink...
ok i guess i'll end on that one.
2. watch a fraiser marathon
3. walk the taylor/california hill 10 times back to back
4. walk through the tenderloin with $1000 cash in my back pocket
5. shit every time i blink...
ok i guess i'll end on that one.
Tuesday, June 5, 2007
A day off.
Today began early as most of my days in San Francisco have began. I apparently only sleep in rooms where direct light can shoot a laser beam through my window and onto my slumbering face. Its like someomne is pointing a prism directly outside my window. But after the suns rude awakening, I realized I had the day off anyway, so I should probably get started. Sat in bed, showered, and headed over to my friends Justins, where we were supposed to do Yoga, but were lazy and got coffee instead. We went to the brainwash, which I love. But I've heard that Rachel Ray did a review on it and loved it, which if you have been to the brainwash, I have a hard time picturing here there. Or at least walking into and stepping out of there. Its in the heart of SOMA, and her precious manicured toenails would probably step on at least a couple dirty syringes on the way out. Anyways, bail on Yoga, onto the addictions, and then home for some errands. De and I went out, I opened a new bank account with possibly the worlds sweetest women at US Bank. I will probably find an excuse to go to the bank now when I miss my mom solely to see this women and have her make me feel better. We also went to a great sushi place in Little Italy ( i know, talk about an oxymoron), but it was suprisingly fantastic. Overall, good day, no Samovar. Success.
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